A whole lot.
I logged back into facebook for either the 2nd or 3rd time since de-activating almost a year ago, and I’m struck more and more each time by how much I hate it. Facebook stinks. It’s the pits. It stinks worse than the garbage put out on a regular-pick-up-day-that’s-also-a-holiday-but-you-don’t-realize-it-until-after-the-fact-so-it-stays-out-four-days-longer-than-you-had-intended-until-the-next-regular-pick-up-day-comes-around. Oh, and it also rains before then.
Yup, I really don’t care about my “friends”, and my “acquaintances”, and my “relatives”. Okay, I’m not really sure why ‘relatives’ has quotes around it, I am actually related to them.
Here’s the thing about facebook: there are positive sides to it. But gosh darn, if that’s the criteria than there’re a heck of a lot of things I’m “missing out” on. Drinking. Clubbing. Drugs. Sleeping Around With Whomever You Want Whenever You Want.
Don’t give me that look, facebook is very much comparable to all those vices. The only thing I would like facebook for, would be for information’s sake. I saw a couple of bands that I’d “liked” when I was on fbook, and I don’t really have a way currently of finding out when they’re touring. I would like that. But that’s really about it. If I like you and if you like me, email and cell phones are the way to go. It’s more personal, and you’re calling/emailing me because you took the time out to think about me and decided you wanted to keep in touch. There’s also that thing called “hanging out” – it’s when you go out and do stuff with friends and are spending the time actually enjoying each other’s company instead of posting on facebook while we’re together.
Yeah, I’ve had that happen. With multiple “friends”. Who, no surprise there, are not my friends anymore. It’s fine if it’s once. Twice, okay, fine. But if you’re on your phone every 5-10 minutes (I’m actually not exaggerating) either posting something on facebook about how you’re out at such and such a place with friend x (me), or taking pictures for the sole purpose of posting them on facebook right at that moment, you’re clearly not there for me, you’re there to show you’re other 500 friends that you’re out with a friend.
In a way I feel very sorry for these people. What level of insecurity causes people to act like this?
Regardless, I’m tired of making excuses for people. I’m tired of having to think things like, “Well, maybe he/she is having a really bad day and that’s why they’re acting in this manner.” I’m really tired of it. I have bad days too. I have insecurities too. I’m not talking from a superior plane here, I’m actually talking from a much inferior plane that you’ve put me on by taking things out on me, or by treating me a certain way when I would never do that to you.
So here’s how much I don’t care: A whole, frikkin lot.
I want to live my life and that’s all I want to do. I don’t want you to be a part of it, you 350 “friends” who I was never even taken by in high school so I’m not sure why I felt the need to be connected to you now. If my life isn’t on track, I want to get it on track myself, with family and the wee handful of friends I actually want to be with. If my life is on track, I want to be happy by myself, not with the crack that is facebook.
There is one more positive thing that comes from facebook: the articles. Those brilliant pieces that people share and that you inevitably come across because by the end of the day at least 200 of your 351 friends have shared it. It goes back again to the idea that just because something has benefits, that doesn’t mean it must be used.
Let me tie this to where my life currently stands. What I’ve learned as a political science major who then spent an obscene amount of time applying to graduate schools in international relations and putting an obscene amount of her self worth into whether she got in or not is the following:
Life is too short to be an international relation-ist (it’s a word. Look it up, you’ll find it on a certain drummer’s wordpress site, which just confirms that it’s a word). Way too short. Plus, you’ll constantly fall short because it just isn’t possible to keep up with every single aspect of every single event going on in the world at every single moment. It’s not a good feeling at all. You’ll also soon realize that none of the jobs out there in the field of international relations matter in the slightest. Which means that you’ll be spending your life doing something that doesn’t matter.
I don’t much care for spending my life doing something that doesn’t matter.