Staying In The Game

                                 

 

“I try to make a move just to stay in the game,” Tom Chaplin of Keane sings. “I try to stay awake and remember my name.”

I feel as if I’m struggling just to keep my head above the water. It’s a swimming race and I’m so far behind I barely count as part of the race. And that’s with all my effort. I’d be on the shore far behind if I wasn’t struggling and kicking and constantly punching the water to try and stay afloat and move a minuscule amount forward. And then, at the end of the day or week or month I’m exhausted and tired out and I think, well, at least I’ve moved forward, but then I look down and I realize that not only have I not moved forward, all my struggling has actually pushed me back a foot. 

And I don’t know if I have the energy to keep going. Sometimes the discouragement from going backwards when you’re giving it your all can keep you from ever getting anywhere. Sometimes. 

“Just stay in the ring for three rounds,” the main character on Little Mosque on the Prairie tells the Imam, “just keep evading your opponent, stay in the ring, and we’ll call it a win.” We’ll call it a win if I can just keep going. That’s all I have to do; keep at it, keep fighting, and stay in the game. The mental fight against the discouragement is the fight at this point. That is the game. If I can win against that, then I’ll have won, insha’Allah. 

Maybe what counts at this point is not the public race but my own race against myself. Maybe I should stop for a bit; stay in place and just stay afloat. Not letting myself drown, even if I’m not moving forward, is a win in itself I should think. Maybe allowing myself the time and not piling on the mental anguish of not moving forward will help me relax enough that I will be able to move forward again. Maybe. Insha’Allah. 

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2 thoughts on “Staying In The Game

  1. first –LOVE the new design layout…. NICE!!!

    awww… LOVEEE this post!!! it both healed and inspired me — even tho this was just a simple ‘no-brainer’ for you — it might possibly be what saves a society. LOL 🙂

    you know what i realized recently that relates to this — the journey of life is so diverse…. many pathways lead to Rome… and inshAllah many pathways lead to Allah swt’s pleasure with us and Jannah iA. Ameen!!! 🙂

    Whatever road life takes us on, it’s not necessarily b/c of our efforts. This goes for both good and bad times — which is both humbling and relieving. SubhanAllah! 🙂

    It’s much, much easier said then done…. with time I’ve learned that life — just as in nature — is a series of ebbs and flows, waxes and wanes…Afterall, Allah swt tells us that indeed He will test us with hardship…. and that indeed after hardship follows ease…

    The purpose of our life here is to worship Allah swt. Period. I find this so hard to apply b/c it’s so liberating yet also so difficult to accept. It’s just too good to be true!!! All we have to do is do our best to please Allah swt by being as best as we can in our circumstances and capacities — and we’re all good??!!

    I think, though, when we lose our egos we can accept this simple, beautiful, powerful and liberating truth — as long as we love Allah swt and His beloved Messenger — regardless of how awesome/not awesome, conventional/unconventional our lives are — we are on the right track of our life!!!

    “Struggling to strive afloat…”…. I love that you mention this!!!! I used to think that arriving at the goal or dream is where all the glory lies… but I realized that in Islam — we honor the struggle as much as we celebrate the victory…. it is in the process of the struggle that I feel our hearts are softened and we truly feel and comprehend “There is no god but God.. and that Prophet (S) is His messenger…”

    And what more beautiful feeling can we ever experience!!!! To struggle is to come closer to Allah swt 🙂 What a blessing!!! 🙂 It is these intangible diamonds that I feel are the most beautiful gifts that Allah swt gives us.

    And meanwhile we can make dua for sabr to help us see the Light. Allah swt’s Light can light up any darkness and penetrate even through the darkest parts of the ocean 😀 SubhanAllah!!!! 😀

    Thank you for this inspiring and healing post!!!! I feel giddy with excitement about the splendour of Allah swt and the gift of Islam….

    THX — LOVE U SIS!

  2. Thank you sis! I love you so much!!!

    I agree, the struggle is rewarded just as much in Islam as the end, whether the end is positive or negative in the eyes of the struggler. It’s something to think about because then the result doesn’t matter so much in the scheme of things. As long as you’re on the right path and doing what you have to do, you get rewarded. Alhamdulillah 🙂

    And if the purpose of our life is to worship Allah swt, then that’s really all we have to do. Just stay on the right path, refrain from doing wrong, and keep moving. That’s really beautiful and I think you’re right when you say that it’s so simple and liberating but also sometimes hard to accept. May Allah allow us to worship Him as He should be worshipped, and help us to always stay on the right path. Ameen. 🙂

    Had such a great time last weekend. Love that your my sister. I’m so gash darn lucky to have someone as amazing as you in my life!!! 🙂

    Love you so much!!!!!!!

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